Lieutenant Governor picks are in the news.
Tom Emmer picked Annette Meeks.
Ole Savior picked Elvis.
Margaret Anderson Kelliher picked John Gunyou.
Mark Dayton picked Yvonne Prettner Salon.
And word is that Matt Entenza is going to pick Robyne Robinson.
That leaves Tom Horner (well, and others, too, but who has the time?) without a date. Can we help? Of course we can!
From the list above, you can see that gender balance, regional balance, specific expertise, ideological balance or maybe continuity, name recognition, and general entertainment value are all considerations.
For Horner, I suggest that he really emphasize the entertainment value. Otherwise, he could just as well tap the Oscar Mayer wiener (image from Gasoline Alley Antiques). That is what he’ll probably be left holding anyway, especially if Anderson Kelliher and Gunyou win the primary. Gunyou’s strength was Horner’s raison d'être.
It’s hard to be taken seriously as the top budget guy in the race when somebody on another ticket has been the top budget guy for the City of Minnetonka, the City of Minneapolis, and the State of Minnesota.
So how do we balance Horner’s somnolence? This is harder than it looks, as I suspect the Horner campaign is now discovering. Especially when the field is narrowed to non-DFLers and non-Republicans, at least candidates not heavily identified with either one.
Elvis is already spoken for. Jesse Ventura is, of course, a natural, but he would never agree to be a second banana. And I think he lives in Mexico.
You’re beginning to see how difficult this is for the Horner campaign, aren’t you, boys and girls? But here’s my list of candidates who could really help Horner: Prince, Joe Maurer, Lindsey Whalen, Ruth Kozlak, or maybe Raven (Ron Schara’s dog; he/she/it
are is (what what I thinking?) really popular at the State Fair).
Please feel free to leave your own suggestions for Tom in the comments.