Des Moines, Iowa (CNN) - Prominent Iowa faith leader Bob Vander Plaats asked Michele Bachmann to dramatically alter her White House plans, according to the Bachmann campaign, including the possibility of dropping her presidential bid altogether.
"[Bob] Vander Plaats called us on Saturday and asked us to consider the possibility of merging with another candidate," Bachmann spokeswoman Alice Stewart told CNN. "He did not say whether we should be president or vice presidential candidate.
"And obviously, we didn't even consider that," Stewart added. "We said, 'Why would we do that?' "
Why indeed, Alice?
Well, for one thing, Michele is a woman, and Febrile Bob is a Dutch Reformed preacher, which means that Febrile Bob thinks he has authority over Michele. He even thinks Jesus told him that he did. We have to say in Febrile Bob's defense that when you believe that you are -- how shall I put this? -- infected with the mind of God, everyone else, including mere candidates for president of the United States, seem so mortal.
And Michele has led Febrile Bob on a little too, by not only being a fool for Christ, but a fool for Febrile Bob, as well. Remember Febrile Bob's little pledge that included the preamble about slavery not being so bad, and that Michele was the first candidate to belly up to the, um, bar to sign it?
You knew that was going to come back to bite somebody: making Febrile Bob think he was the king maker. And a matchmaker, too. (Febrile Bob to a sidekick preacher: Watch this; I can make 'em do anything!)
But in the end, Michele and Alice are way too modern for Febrile Bob. You go, girls.