Monday, July 20, 2009

Harry Potter and the Invisible Hand

Hey, ‘Arry, you there?

Ron, go away, I’m trying to sleep.

I’m not Ron, ‘Arry.



Hermoine? What are you doing in the boys’ dorm?

In your dreams, ‘Arry.

Then who are you?

I’m the Invisible Hand.

I can’t see you.

[mutters under breath] Jesus, ‘Arry, what did I say my name was?

Oh, right: the Invisible Hand. Then how do I know you’re real?

You infer me.

Infer you? How?

Well, you know what some people infer from the beauty of flowers, don’t you, ‘Arry?


Right. I’m like that.

Oh, come on now.

‘Arry, when you go to the apothecary to buy tooth powder, what do you see?

Well, if I’m lucky, I see Glenda, the clerk.

Come on ‘Arry, focus! [mutters: hormones]

Well, row on row of tooth powder, I suppose.

That right, ‘Arry! That’s me!

You make tooth powder?

No! Of course not! I make people make tooth powder.

I don’t get it. What do you do, whisper in their ears, like now?

It’s much more subtle than that, ‘Arry. I just kind of put the idea in their heads, you see? And they just go and do it!

That’s amazing!

Yes, it is!

Can you make people make anything?

Yes, I can.



Do you ever have people make too much of something?

Advertising is supposed to take care of that, ‘Arry! Creatin’ demand, we call it; saved my bacon a time or two, let me tell you!

All right. Can you make people do good?

[defensively] What do you mean by that, ‘Arry?

I don’t know; something that benefits everyone.

Never mind about that, ‘Arry. We’re going to have some adventures, you and I. I’m going to show you some things and introduce you to some people.

Great; when do we start?

Patience boy; soon.

Invisible Hand? Hello? I guess he’s gone.

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