Saturday, July 21, 2007

Governor Pepsodent's dating dilemma

What do you do at a dance when you find out that your date is a drag--or maybe in drag, haha--and you don't want to waste the whole evening? Well, you start chatting up other people, of course. Maybe you find somebody, but there's always that awkward moment in ditching person A for person B. So we can all appreciate Governor Pepsodent's problem. He picked a date to the big dance that he thought would be, well, easy, and now he finds that he picked the Iron Maiden and she wants to go for a swim. What's the plan? Find a more buoyant date!

Do you know, boys and girls, what we call people like this?

Norm Coleman?

[hysterical laughter] That's not what Spot had in mind grasshopper, but it's funny. Spot was thinking of another member of the animal kingdom: weasels. Or maybe the prescient rats abandoning ship.

There was an article on the National Journal's "daily briefing on politics" called the Hotline a couple of days ago that discussed Governor Pepsodent's dating dilemma. The guv was in Washington--again--last week, and he managed to blow some kisses to Mitt Romney:

In a round-about fashion, one reporter (OK, it was our own Charlie Cook) was able to infer a bit about Pawlenty's WH '08 outlook from a "state-based" perspective. Asked who he would most want at the top of his party's ticket if he were running for re-election in '08, Pawlenty carefully replied on behalf of his "light blue" state saying he would want a president who appealed to the GOP base as well as indies and moderates. Although he said there are "several" who could do that, he went on to list just two -- Mitt Romney and McCain -- respectively.

One has to wonder where the GOP's "next superstar" will turn if his current dog really quits the race. Here are some suggestions inspired from today's luncheon. Granted this kind of guess work might be premature, but Mehlman and other DC GOPers certainly see something in his brand of populist conservatism, often referred to as "Sam's Club Republicans" this afternoon.

-- Get on the Romney bus. First, Pawlenty dropped Romney's name today at lunch. Secondly, Pawlenty's media luncheon was hosted in part today at Akin Gump by Weber, Romney's adviser and cheerleader on all things wonky. Finally, Romney dropped Pawlenty's name in a 7/8 interview with U.S. News and World Report, calling him an example, along with Arnold Schwarzenegger, of the way states are working and balancing budgets, even if DC is faltering. We might be reading too much into this, but at the very least the two men have shown affinity for some of each other's policies.

It even seems like Mitt is blowing them back. That's a good sign, Timmy!

You know, boys and girls, don't you, that Governor Pepsodent has already pledged his troth to John McCain for '08, in the hope of securing the veep spot? It seemed like a reasonable thing to do at the time, but the starship McCain is now trapped in a decaying orbit. Pundits cite various reasons; one of the principal ones is that McCain favors an immigration reform bill that would grant amnesty--although don't call it that, please--to undocumented aliens in the United States. That alienated the mouth breathers and the knuckle draggers in the Republican party, also known as the "base."

Governor Pepsodent's delicate maneuvering away from his date by "going to the punchbowl" has begun.

If Governor Pepsodent is any kind of a man, he'll stick like glue to McCain and dance with the one who brung him. But Spot wouldn't bet on it.

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