Thursday, January 27, 2011

Takin' away our freedoms


I've always wondered when the Tea Party penchant for hyperbole would eventually trickle down to curse the everyday losses of our fundamental freedoms. Like when you have to follow the traffic laws. Stop lights that stay red when no one's around except you, that whole speed limit thing, those ridiculous rules about licensing -- they really are just more frog-in-the-boiling water moments in the slow march toward slavery. But now we have a man from Missouri who sees the cabal of communist judges, prosecutors, and court scheduling clerks for what they truly are: agents of oppression of the highest magnitude.

When the jack booted thugs gave Ray Wolf citations for traffic violations, he used his rights as an American to go to court to fight them. As often happens, there were some scheduling issues that didn't sit right with Mr. Wolf. When he sent some pointed letters to the court requesting a continuance of his hearing, Mr. Wolf took the opportunity to inform them that he was on to their dastardly communist plot:
To let you know I use the word “Judge” lightly in your case. Your asshole (traffic cop) wrote me that ticket, committing constructive treason, and perjury of his oath, as you are about to do. If I come down there you damn sure won’t want me in your courtroom. I know you have people in the courthouse guarding your sorry “Communist” ass. I told you I am currently “Out OF STATE” and I demand a continuance. This is no longer a request!
The gentleman continued to provide the court with other examples of their treason, but the judges didn't take too well to the letters. He was eventually tried and convicted of tampering with a judicial officer in violation of Missouri law. At trial, his defense counsel employed the argument that we often hear when extremists are called out on their over-the-top rhetoric: I didn't mean it that way! He argued:
These are words, that Jeffersonian style words which have been used to inspire people. However, this was not the purpose. This is for shock.

These things like liberty, tyrants, blood, this is just firing language that's used to shock and awe people. It's the type of language that gets Americans to stand up and throw British into the ocean. It's the type of language used by Martin Luther King because you've talked people into walking from Selma, Alabama all the way to Montgomery knowing that the highway patrolmen were going to beat the crap out of them when they hit the bridge.
The appeal of his conviction was eventually denied, and you can read the entire opinion here.

But the prosecutor at trial did get to deliver what must be one of the best lines ever in a closing argument:
I might have missed some days in history class in high school, but I don't remember Thomas Jefferson ever telling you, "You can take that arrest warrant and shove it up your Communist ass."
I stand in awe.

Via Above the Law

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