Who's the woman, Spot?
Really? Wow! What does she doubt? The account in the Bible's book of Luke about the virgin birth of Jesus? Luke was written at least a generation or two after Jesus' death.
No; she believes that all right.
How about Jesus rising from the dead? Again, there are no written first-hand accounts, only oral tradition that was handed down to the gospel writers, who were in turn selected to be in the Bible only later.
Nope; she doesn't doubt that either.
Then what does she doubt?
[hysterical laughter] Oh come on! She can't possibly doubt that!
Regrettably, it's not a laughing matter, grasshopper. Evidence of global warming is irrefutable:
Scientists have found the first unequivocal link between man-made greenhouse gases and a dramatic heating of the Earth's oceans. The researchers - many funded by the US government - have seen what they describe as a "stunning" correlation between a rise in ocean temperature over the past 40 years and pollution of the atmosphere.
The study destroys a central argument of global warming skeptics within the Bush administration - that climate change could be a natural phenomenon. It should convince George Bush to drop his objections to the Kyoto treaty on climate change, the scientists say.
Goddard Institute for Space Studies' James Hansen agrees:
Even "moderate additional" greenhouse emissions are likely to push Earth past "critical tipping points" with "dangerous consequences for the planet," according to research conducted by NASA and the Columbia University Earth Institute.
With just 10 more years of "business as usual" emissions from the burning of coal, oil and gas, says the NASA/Columbia paper, "it becomes impractical" to avoid "disastrous effects."
The study appears in the journal Atmospheric Chemistry and Physics. Its lead author is James Hansen, director of NASA's Goddard Institute for Space Studies in New York.
The forecast effects include "increasingly rapid sea-level rise, increased frequency of droughts and floods, and increased stress on wildlife and plants due to rapidly shifting climate zones," according to the NASA announcement.
But drooling idiots like Michele Bachmann want to fiddle while earth burns. She not only doubts global warming concerns, she calls them a "hoax."
Maybe it's all part of the Rapture pre-game show for Michele, but it's not for Spot. But, sigh, Michele will undoubtedly next favor us with her theory of how the earth is surrounded by crystal globes in which the stars are fixed to rotate around the earth.