Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Good grief, Sarah!


Who's that?

Who do you think it is?

My conscience?

Think bigger.

Oh My God!



I change genders every couple of days, just to keep it interesting.

I don't know what to say.

That's a first. Actually, I have something I want to say to you.

I'm all ears, Lord.

I doubt that, but here goes. I understand that you said you would run for president if I told you to. Is that right?

Oh, you know it is, Lord. Is that what you are telling me now?

Jesus Christ!

[from the next room] What, Dad?

Never mind, Son. [returning to the conversation with Sarah] I will never tell you to run for president.

Don't you think I would make a good and faithful servant president for You?

I am not going to answer that. I don't do politics, and it really honks me off when politics does me. I keep telling your fellow traveler Michele Bachmann that, too. Just keep me out of it.

I don't think I can do that, Lord.

Why? Because without the holy trappings it is obvious to everyone, including the evangelicals, that you are just an unschooled, untutored, incurious lump?

[making a little pout with her lips] That wasn't very generous!

Stow it, Sarah, I'm impervious to flirting.

Well, I guess I'll just have to pretend that You told me to run, just like Michele did. She fasted and everything, made it look really good.

And the sad thing is, a lot of people will believe you. Intelligent design my hind end.

Well, sometimes I do think I hear Your Voice.

Sarah, when you talk to me, that's praying. When I talk back, it's probably just schizophrenia.

What are You saying, Lord?

[pause] Lord, are You there? Hello?

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