Ralph [one of the ministers at Haggard's former church] said three weeks of counseling at an undisclosed Arizona treatment center helped Haggard immensely and left Haggard sure of one thing.
"He is completely heterosexual," Ralph said. "That is something he discovered. It was the acting - out situations where things took place. It wasn't a constant thing."
Why Haggard chose to act out in that manner is something Haggard and his advisers are trying to discern, Ralph said.
Isn't this a great blessing, boys and girls? What? Grasshopper, you look skeptical.
How dumb does he think people are?
Maybe not so much dumb as gullible, grasshopper.
Either way, it's an absurd claim.
Spot agrees. The best is yet to come, however. According to the article:
The Rev. Tim Ralph of Larkspur also said the four-man oversight board strongly urged Haggard to go into secular work instead of Christian ministry if Haggard and his wife follow through on plans to earn [online] master's degrees in psychology.
The article says that the Haggards are considering moving to Missouri or Iowa, but Spot urges them to come to Minnesota. They could go into practice with Marcus Bachmann!
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